The OCp: End of an Era

When I left the Annex several weeks ago, I pledged to try to continue this regular series of work-related stories from our west office, OCP. I have done that for the past 5 weeks or so but am quickly discovering that while this is a much nicer office, it is, well, boring. Let’s face it, no regular office can compete with the oddities the come along with having your office inside a mall. Men on scooters chasing after you? Abandoned stores? Haunted theatres? Yes please!

With that said, I am going to stop writing this as a regular series (sorry Joe). [Commence weeping.] I’m not giving up on it entirely as I’m sure there will be things to report from time to time, perhaps I will even head back to the Annex. But for now, I just don’t have enough content to continue a weekly serial.

It’s sort of fitting to end this as a regular series after this week because there were a lot of finales here. First of all, I no longer have a desk down at the Annex. {tear} The Brit emailed me asking if I still needed that desk reserved for me, and well, I don’t. On the rare occasion that I go down there for a meeting, I’ll just have to find some place else to park. Maybe Scooter would let me sit on his lap and give me rides around the mall. Who are we kidding – of course he’d let me do that (and I think I just puked in my mouth a little). Or perhaps I could use his designated bathroom stall nap room as a temporary office. When in doubt, there’s always the dumpster, as Barry well knows.

Speaking of Scooter, the Brit tells me that there were complaints lodged about him to the mall management and he’s been removed from the property. Removed or else he’s hiding out somewhere. Perhaps in the back of his brother’s restaurant? I kind of feel bad for the guy. Sure he was creepy, but in a cute, “old guy next door who flirts with all his neighbors but you know is harmless” kind of way.

Finally, it seems that one of the meeting rooms is being shut down for good at The Mall. I got an email the other day that said:

In an effort to minimize utility consumption and reduce expenses, we will be permanently closing the Lower Level Multipurpose Room effective March 7, 2011. Closing the room now and cleaning up unused furniture and supplies will also make the transition to our new space an easier process.

Translation – there’s too much mold in this room for it to be considered safe so we’re closing it up.

Or, perhaps there’s another reason. This is what our group think:

  • Me: Aw look, they’re closing the multi-purpose room. So sad…
  • Bob: Also, the bodies are starting to smell. Wish us luck in finding better facilities.
  • Brit: Bodies? I don’t know what you are talking about….
  • Bob: Seriously, that was the worst meeting room in the history of humanity, humanities future, and more. It is probably haunted by hundreds of ghosts too bored to spook anyone.
  • Brit: HA HA! Too damp to spook anyone you mean…they have to keep wringing their sheets!
  • Bubbles: But there is table tennis and Foosball down there!

Maybe they’ll find Scooter’s real home back there. Or maybe that’s where he’s hiding out…

Now on to OCP news. They brought in donuts and pizza yesterday for us. And guess what – I was invited this time! I feel so loved. While eating, the Brit told us about her scary spider incident from the other day.

Apparently, she was using the company gym, and running on the treadmill, when she saw something out of the corner of her eye. She looked over to see a spider dangling from the ceiling a few feet away from her. Naturally, she tried to run away from it but hey, she was on the treadmill, so she didn’t get very far. She had to ask one of the guys in there to come get it. He did and then hung the little web off the lat pull down bar so that when the next poor chap who wants to buff up his back muscles goes to use it, he’ll get attacked by a vicious spider. Note that if that spider had hung from the ceiling at the Annex, he would have been a mutated tarantula wearing a raincoat and holding inhalers in each leg. He would have looked up at The Brit, said “Allo” in a deep husky voice and then offered her a cup of tea, which she would have taken because hey, she’s British.

The other take away from lunch yesterday was that the Brit hates Josh Groban. I happen to like Josh Groban so when I returned to my desk I sent her an IM that said “I Josh Groban.” She responded with “Barf” then proceeded to tell me that she was enjoying a piece of cheesecake. I asked her where she got it from and she said, “From your broken dreams.” That’s it, she is so going to pay for teasing me with luscious creamy cheesecake! Let’s just say someone may or may not have touched/licked/rubbed on all some of her office supplies. I don’t know who it could have been…I just hope The Brit is up on her vaccinations.

[Reading back over this I realized that I used strike through way too much a lot in this post. I hope that doesn't annoy anyone. If it does too bad so sad because this is my blog and I'll do what I want to. Sorry if it does!]

That’s all for this week! Thanks for tuning in to…

If you liked this, you might also like:

The OCp: The Premiere

The OCp: from A to Zamboni

The OCp: Winter Woes

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