Normally I don’t talk a whole lot about my sex life because, well, it’s private and I’m just not the kind of person to be all up in your face with my private business.

Well except of course for bowel movements or icing down my vajayjay. That’s totally fair game!

Obviously CJ and I have “marital relations” on a regular basis. I mean, I am pregnant and we have another child so we’ve at least done it twice right?

We’re always very careful to make sure  Isabella is sleeping or out of the house and lock our bedroom door. Well it’s a good thing we did last weekend because someone caught us in the act.

Or rather, overheard us in the act.

We were doing our thang – door locked and monitor on so that we could hear her if she woke up – and once we were done, got dressed and ready to head downstairs for some quality TV and ice cream time. Who needs a post coital cigarette when you have brownie sundaes, amiright?

Anyway, I opened the door to the bedroom and noticed that Isabella’s door was open. We always close her door when we put her down so that meant she had been up and about. Then I heard crying. Now mind you, we did not hear any noise or crying on the monitor which had me slightly confused. Turns out she started the waterworks just as I was opening the door. I soon found out why.

I went in her room to see what was the matter and she was all upset and couldn’t talk. She wanted me to hold her, so I did. I asked her if she had a nightmare and she said no. I asked if she was sick and she said no. I asked if something scared her and she said yes.

“What scared you, sweetheart?”

“I wasn’t sure what that noise was you and Daddy were making.”

“What noise?”

And she proceeded to make a sound that was a child’s version of heavy breathing mixed with a squeak.

Then it dawned on me. Oh dear God.

I asked if we woke her up and she nodded yes (believe me, we were not THAT loud so she must have been in a very light sleep, if she was asleep at all). I then asked if she had come down the hall to our room and listened at the door. Again she said yes.

I have no idea how long she stood there or how much she heard. And honestly, I don’t think I want to know. It’s mortifying enough!

I explained to her that Mommy and Daddy were have a private moment but that we were ok and there was nothing to worry or be scared about. And I was sorry that we woke her up. She seemed satisfied by that explanation and went right back to sleep.

I darted downstairs and made an extra-large brownie sundae.

Thank goodness for ice cream and bedroom doors that lock!

 

While you’re here, why not stay and read some more!

The Translator | Puff | Opportunities