National Eating Disorders Awareness Week

Posted in Health and Weightloss by teamtradermom

Today marks the beginning of National Eating Disorders Awareness Week. While it’s not the funniest or most entertaining topic to write about, it is an important one, and one that I can relate to.

I don’t have an eating disorder in the clinical sense of the word. I don’t starve myself to lose weight and I don’t purge after eating. But I do have eating issues. I talked last week about how much I love food and eating. I made light of it at the time but got real serious about just how bad my diet has been when I found myself in another night of pain and agony in the bathroom on Friday. See, while eating so much junk food hasn’t caused me to gain weight, it has caused other issues. My energy levels have been low, I’ve felt tired all week, I have a hard time concentrating, and my regularity flew out the window causing Friday night’s incident.

In my blog last Monday about my food habits, I mentioned that I needed some kind of goal or catalyst to eat right. That was brought up again during lunch this week with friends. Someone mentioned having a light bulb moment a few years ago and realizing then that she needed to do something about her weight and eating habits. Well Friday night was my light bulb moment. As I sat on the toilet waiting for the next wave of cramps and pain to come I thought to myself, “I’m really getting tired of this. Why is my body going through this cycle again?” It was then that I realized it wasn’t food poisoning or salmonella or the flu causing me such discomfort – it was my own choices.

We’re supposed to eat for fuel and nutrients, plain and simple. It’s not for entertainment, therapy or sport, but that’s how our society has made it out to be. Last week my diet consisted of cookies, cakes, donuts, bagels, french fries, cheeseburgers, Cheetos, candy, hash browns and various other forms of starch and sugar. We’re supposed to eat 5 fruits and vegetables a day right? I probably had 5 all week. No wonder I felt like crap! I ate all that stuff because I was stressed and it was easy and convenient.

Well no more. The light bulb went off on Friday and I realized that I need to change my ways of eating not necessarily to lose weight but keep my body functioning properly. Heart disease runs in my family and if things don’t change, I’ll be headed down the same path as my dad and all his siblings. I started the change yesterday. I drank lots of fluids and tried to work in fruits and vegetables as much as possible. I don’t think I got my full 5 in, but it was a good start. I also limited my junk food to one item. I knew we were going to be celebrating my nephew’s birthday in the evening so I didn’t have any sweets until the cake was served that night. And you know what? It really wasn’t that hard. It helped that the memory (and discomfort) were still fresh in my mind from Friday night. As the days go on it will probably be harder before it becomes a habit, but I can do it. I have to.

Not only does NEDA week focus on eating, it also focuses on body image. So many young girls out there are trying to make themselves look like the super models and celebrities they see on TV. How sad is it that kids are so worried about how they look that they stop being kids? I personally didn’t start becoming self conscious of my looks until high school but the age is getting younger and younger. I over heard an elementary school girl ask her mom at Kohl’s one time if the jeans she was trying on made her look fat. The mom said no in one breath but in the next, said that they should probably hit the gym when they were done shopping.

We all need to focus on loving ourselves for who we are rather than hating the image we see in the mirror. As Caitlyn from Operation Beautiful says, “WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL. You are enough… just the way you are!”

I encourage everyone to use this week to take a close look at yourself. What are you doing to sabotage your self? Do your eating habits need to change? Does your negative self-talk need to stop? Is there a young girl or boy in your life who you see going down a wrong path that you could help? Whatever it is, do it this week. And keep doing it.

This afternoon I’m participating in the local NEDA Week Walk. Instead of charging us an entry fee, participants are encouraged to bring clothing items to donate. I used this as an opportunity to go through my closet and pull out the items that cause me to feel bad about myself. The dress that I try on from time to time and then promptly take off because I feel fat in it. The shirt that is just a little too tight and shows all the wrong things. I don’t need these items in my closet taunting me and someone else could use them and look fabulous.

My new goal is not to lose weight or find that perfect number on the scale, but rather to find healthy ways to fuel my body and mind. I am beautiful and I can do this. So can you.

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14Feb2011

Don’t Call me Late for Dinner!

Posted in Health and Weightloss by teamtradermom

Lately I’ve been feeling sluggish and tired all the time. I thought it was because I had a cold or something. Then this weekend I realized it was because my eating habits have gone downhill and I’ve slacked on the exercising. Time to get back on track and on the road to feeling better. There’s just one problem – I love food!!

Anyone that knows me knows that I have an obsession with food. It is constantly in the forefront of my mind. And not just any food – tasty, rich, yummy food (vegetables need not apply)!

Most of my life this was not a problem. I had a high metabolism and so didn’t have to worry about it. But the years have caught up with me and my metabolism isn’t what it used to be. Combine that with a 56 lb. weight gain during pregnancy and you have one unhappy, overweight mom with sore breasts and no sleep. Be afraid, be very afraid. So, I worked hard and lost 61 pounds last year and now actually weigh less than I did before pregnancy.

However, my love for food has not gone away and with no motivation to lose weight, my will power and resolve have flown out the window. Lately I’ve pretty much been eating whatever I want or feel like, giving in to whims, temptations and emotional eating. It doesn’t help that a new sugary piece of heaven shows up in our pod at work everyday and I can’t refuse. That would be rude. I haven’t starting gaining too much weight yet (just a pound or 2) but if I don’t curb this now, I’ll end up right back where I started.

Part of the problem is that I don’t like vegetables but do love starches and sweets and generally all things high in fat and calories. Like I said before, I think about food all the time. So while I’m eating breakfast, I’m already wondering what I’ll have for lunch. During lunch my mind wanders to my afternoon snack and then quickly to dinner. If I’m sad, I want chocolate to make it better. If I’m stressed, please hand me some cookies. If I’m happy, help me celebrate by going out for burgers!

See what I mean?

The following are statements that I totally don’t understand:

Wow, I was so busy today that I forgot to eat lunch.
Hold the cheese please.
Could I get extra vegetables with that?
I’m not really a ‘sweets’ person.
No dessert for me, I’m full.
Oh man, these fresh veggies really hit the spot!
I’m craving fruit right now.
No bread for me, I’ll just wait for my meal.
Just a small piece of cake please.
No french fries, I’ll take a side salad instead.

I mean, come on. How does one forget to eat? And why on Earth would you want extra vegetables? I read a few healthy living blogs each day and they always showcase their meals, which consist of quinoa and veggies and kale and ground flaxseed and more veggies. Who really eats like that? I admire those women as I wish that would satisfy me but it just doesn’t.

When CJ and I were dating, he wanted to order a pizza with only half the cheese and I almost broke up with him on the spot. I mean, really, there are some things that are non-negotiable. Thank goodness he was cute or his butt would have been kicked to the curb!

So how is one to maintain their weight loss and yet feel satisfied and able to enjoy the food they love?

They say that if you treat yourself with small portions of your favorite foods, you’ll be able to stay on track. The problem for me is sticking with small portions. I’ve tried the “grazing” thing where you eat 6 small meals a day but it didn’t work. Apparently a burger and fries doesn’t count as a small meal.

The only thing I’ve found that works for me is to either be mandated to eat better (like by a doctor or something) or have a specific target/goal in mind (i.e. being able to wear a bikini during our summer vacation). Right now I don’t really have either of those so I need to find something to drive me. I realize that wanting to be healthy should be enough but honestly, it’s just not.

But I will keep trying. My goal? To feel good about my choices every day. One smart choice at a time is all it takes. A fruit or veggie at every meal? I can probably do that. Skipping the chocolate chip cookies in favor of celery? Probably not. I know my limits.

Here’s to a fresh start, and one good choice at a time!

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31Jan2011

Resolutions Update, 1

Posted in Finances, Goals, Health and Weightloss, House and Home by teamtradermom

1 month down, 11 to go.

Since we have one month of the New Year under our belt, I thought it would be a good time to check in with how my resolutions are going. This helps to keep me accountable!

Here’s where I stand on my 3 resolutions:

Project T&T

Goal: To lose the 3 pounds I’d gained over the holidays and basically tone and tighten all over.

Update: Well I lost the 3 lbs. but not the way I intended to nor in a way that will provide lasting results. Case in point, I’ve put 2 of them back on. I was feeling pretty down and being hard on myself this weekend as I realized I haven’t made much progress here. The problem is that though I work out regularly and hard, I don’t eat that healthy. Let’s just say I have a hard time saying “no.”

Then I did a reality check. First of all, the number on the scale means nothing. What matters is how I feel and how healthy I am. I have a clean bill of health so that’s not an issue. What is the issue is how I feel about my looks. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m hard on myself. I won’t accept anything less than perfection (just ask Team Trader – last week at volleyball I got disgusted with the mistakes I was making and stopped talking. Real grown up, I know.). But I also know that perfection isn’t possible. Heck, even supermodels and celebrities have cellulite!

To that end, here’s what I can say with pride:

Thanks to the one hundred pushups program, my arms are getting toned. Look out Michelle Obama, here comes Sarah Trader!
I have long, lean, and muscular legs. They really got toned up this summer while I trained for a 5k and I’m happy to report that I’ve been able to keep them sculpted.
C-Sections wreak havoc on your abs. They cut ‘em right open and it’s really hard to get them toned again. So while my stomach isn’t flat anymore, my abs are strong thanks in part to the two hundred sit ups program. I still have some extra fat to take off the top so that my six pack can make an appearance, and I’ll keep working on that, but I’ll gladly pay the price of not having flat abs to have my beautiful daughter.

I will continue to push myself in my workouts and try my best with my eating. But I think that for all intents and purposes, I will call this resolution reached and stop being so freaky about it!

Mission Debt Diet

Goal: To pay off our credit card debt and pay down our mortgage and car loans, all the while socking money away in savings.

Update: This one has been good and bad. On the one hand, I’ve managed to pay off almost half of our credit card debt thanks to a nice rebate check from our FSA and regular committed “over payments.” I’ve also been able to consistently put away a dedicated amount of money into savings. I’m really happy about both of those accomplishments.

What we haven’t done so well on is sticking to our budget. We overspent in many categories, including groceries, retail, eating out and entertainment. So it’s time to re-evaluate. Either our budget wasn’t realistic to begin with or we need to work even harder at reigning in the spending. I know for certain that there are some fast food runs that could have been skipped, shopping purchases that I didn’t need and extra groceries that weren’t necessary. I think we’ll stick with the budget as is and try again to be more frugal. If it still doesn’t work then we’ll see if the numbers need to change.

[Update 2/1/11: OK so I was totally wrong. I actually went in and added up our spending from January today and it turns out we were UNDER budget by $73! Go us!]

Operation Dream Home

Goal: Clean, de-clutter, and organize our house, in preparation for putting it on the market this Summer.

Update: I started out really gung-ho on this and have faded a bit. I got some projects done right off the bat and was really excited. But then I got busy, and I was seeing us going over budget, so I stopped. I haven’t done any more projects but what we have done is maintain the organization that I put in place already. The play corner has really helped keep the living room in order and we removed the coffee table (because I always worried that Munchkin would hit her head on the edge) which gives us even more room. Our new filing system in the kitchen has been awesome. And I’ve even kept up with my Perpetual Journal, writing in it every day.

Proof!

I still need to go through closets and other rooms in the house, but that will come. We also need to ID other more “major” projects to be done and get going on those. Last night we CJ steam cleaned the carpets so that was good. They look sooooo much better!

Other

I didn’t talk about any other resolutions in my original post but there are some things I’ve thought of over the weeks that I want to do on a more regular basis. Here they are:

Reach out and call friends to chat. I’ll admit that I’m not a phone person. I’d rather meet and hang out in person or IM or email. I don’t like talking on the phone. But it is important to contact some friends, especially those I don’t see much, and stay in touch.
Floss every night. I know, I know. I used to be a real stickler about this. In fact I’d floss twice a day, every day. But then I got braces (for the third time) when I was in my late 20’s and ended up with 2 permanent retainers (one behind my top teeth and one behind my bottom teeth). So in order to floss, I have to use a special tool and it’s time consuming so I don’t do it every day. But I need to get back to that because, well, it’s gross not to.
Plan date nights. It may seem like CJ and I get a lot of date nights but we really don’t. It just so happens that we’ve had a couple in January. Usually though we get too busy to plan them. Well, not anymore. We need to put them on the calendar like any other appointment and just do it!
Drink more water. This one is a constant struggle for me but still something to work on.
Spend more time with my sister. We both live in Omaha. We’re both moms. You’d think we would hang out more but we don’t. As with everything, life gets in the way. But whenever we do have Sister Nights, it’s really enjoyable. It needs to happen more often.

That’s probably enough. Too much more and I’ll get overwhelmed.

Well, I hear my family playing upstairs so I’m going to close this up and join them for fun! Ta ta!

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18Jan2011

Make it Stop!

Posted in Health and Weightloss by teamtradermom

Last night was a humdinger. I’ll preface this post by saying it involves the bathroom so if you’re grossed out by such conversation, leave now. Don’t worry, I won’t get too graphic. I know it’s kind of personal and not something people talk about, but hey, it happens to everyone so here goes.

The day started out with Samson puking. I was eating my breakfast and watching the TODAY show, not really paying attention to the world around me when I hear, “Oh Samson, really?” I turn around to see that Samson has proceeded to upchuck the entire contents of his stomach on the carpet which included all his breakfast plus the 2 treats I had given him. It was all undigested so I could easily make out each piece. We stopped him before he could eat it back up and got him outside. CJ gets squeamish around bodily fluids so I cleaned it up (though he did help me scoop it onto the dustpan and in to the garbage – yes I said scoop).

The rest of the day was fine. I worked from home because it was a holiday for my client but not for my company so it was either take PTO or work. I chose to work, but thankfully could do it from home. Anyway, I had a perfectly lovely day for the most part and was logged off by 4:00.

I was in the mood to bake so I got busy on some chocolate chip cookies, sampling the dough as I went. I mean, you can’t NOT do that. Heck, if it were up to me, I’d make a batch of cookie dough just to eat and never bake! But, I don’t do that (much). I finished up with my preparations and put the dough in the ‘fridge (baking tip: cookies have better form if you chill the dough before baking it. My dear friend Katie told me that trick and it works!). Then I set to work on dinner. We were going to have chicken parmesan. I made the breading, cut up the chicken, coated it and put it in the oven. As I was doing dishes I got a wave of cramps but it passed quickly so I didn’t think much of it. Just then Munchkin awoke from her nap so I went in to get her. As I was changing her diaper, I got another wave of cramps, a little more intense this time.

Uh oh. I know the drill. It’s just like contractions. The closer together and more intense they are, the sooner the “package” will arrive.

I finished up with Munchkin and took her in to the bedroom where CJ was folding laundry. I told him, she’s all yours man, I got a date with the bathroom. She cried when I went in the master bath and closed the door. I was all, “Honey, trust me, you do not want to be in here with what I think is coming.”

The cramps came and went. They got worse and worse. I started getting feverish. I started getting nauseous. I didn’t know which end things were going to come out of! I was having visions of fainting again and really did not want that to happen. This went on for 15 minutes! I seriously felt like I was in labor again. I tried doing La Maze breathing and it worked just as well as it did during actual labor (translation: not at all). I called out for an epidural but no one would bring it to me. So instead I squeezed the holy living bejeezus out of my hand. Maybe that’s why I was feeling light-headed…finally, the packaged deployed and things subsided.

Phew. It was over. I breathed a sign of relief and went back out to join my family.

Then the universe pointed a finger at me and laughed.

5 minutes later I was back in the bathroom. This time I brought the garbage can in with me in case I had to hurl. I was in there for another 20 minutes going through the same ordeal as before. I was calling out to Jesus, Buddha, Zeus, Thor and anyone else who could possibly help me. By the beard of Oden make this stop!! This time, there were multiple packages being deployed and they kept coming. I didn’t think a person of my size could have so much in her!

By the time it ended I was spent. I curled up on the bed in the fetal position and waited to die. Surely I was on my death-bed after experiencing something so awful. I closed my eyes, thanked God for a good life and eeked out a whispered “I love you” to my family.

Then the world went black.

I woke up 5 minutes later and realized I hadn’t died but instead took a cat nap. I crawled out of bed and went to join my family, eating toast and drinking tea while they had chicken parmesan. But I didn’t care, so long as the ordeal was over. And this time it really was.

When I got up today I weighed myself out of curiosity and am down 3 pounds. Yep, that’s right, I “delivered” 3 pounds worth of, uh, “stuff” last night. Oi vey. When I told CJ that he said, “Guess it was time for some good poopin’.” Gee, thanks honey.

On the up side, one of my New Year’s resolutions is now met! Though, I wouldn’t recommend anyone to do it this way. I would much rather exercise for 24 hours straight than go through that again.

I’m better today for the most part. Still watching what I eat but things seem to be operating normally. Not sure if I got a little stomach bug or if it was something I ate (raw cookie dough anyone?) but whatever it was, I hope it never happens again!

P.S. Samson is fine too. I think he just likes to puke sometimes – it’s a nice morning snack.

4Jan2011

Obligatory Resolutions Post

Posted in Finances, Goals, Health and Weightloss, House and Home by teamtradermom

I’ve noticed a theme this year when it comes to resolutions. Seems like everyone I’ve talked to (or read) has said the same thing – they don’t normally do resolutions but this year is different. Why is this year so different for everyone? While I can’t speak for humanity as a whole, I can tell you my position. For me, I’m making resolutions because I feel stronger this year than I ever have about setting and hitting certain goals. In previous years I had some vague notions of what I wanted in my life, but nothing specific. This year, I’m getting down to brass tacks and making things happen!

One thing I’ve learned is that it’s just as important to plan out how you are going to meet a goal as it is to define it.

So, here are my resolutions for this year (BTW, it makes it way more fun if I put catchy names to them so, bear with me and my cheesiness):

Project T&T (Tone and Tighten)

What: Lose the 3 pounds I put on over the holidays and then tone up all over. I REALLY want to get rid of this muffin top and I’d love to have more definition in my arms, legs, and abs. I’m already seeing more tone from doing the one hundred push ups program. Hoping to see even more progress as I continue. But the goal here is to maintain my weight loss so that all the work I did last year doesn’t go to waste.

How: By doing what I already know works – watching calories (I’ve found that 1400 calories a day works for my body when trying to lose weight) and steady workouts. You may have noticed that a couple of weeks ago I added a section to the right sidebar called “Today’s Workout”. In here, I will record what exercises I’ve done each day. This holds me accountable and call also give you ideas if you’re in a workout rut.

Operation Dream Home

What: Sell our current house and buy our forever home (then I can cross that off the bucket list!). To do that, we have to make sure our house is in tip-top shape so that we can sell it quickly and at our asking price (or close).

How: First off, I’m planning to go through each room and de-clutter. We’ve accumulated too much “stuff” and it needs to go. Once the extra junk is gone, I want to re-organize the remaining items. This will help keep me sane and it will present the house in a neat and tidy way. We also have various things around the house that need fixing or updating: scratched baseboards, repainting the walls, getting new sinks, etc. We have some good friends who are realtors so I want to invite them over and do a walk through of our house as it exists today. They can then tell us what we need to invest time and money into and what we can leave as is.

Here’s one project I’ve already finished – the “catch all” kitchen counter. We have an area to the left of the stove that is where we keep files, stamps, papers to shred, my purse, etc. It is always so messy and I am constantly losing stuff.

Here’s the before:

Notice the files in the back are all crammed in together, there is stuff scattered on the counter, and my purse and lunch bag are eating up a lot of space. So, I put hanging file holders on the wall and labeled them “To Shred” and “To File”. This got rid of one filing system on the counter and freed up some space there.

Here’s the after:

Doesn’t that look so much better? It was a simple fix that went a long way.

Mission Debt Diet

What: To pay off all credit card debt and pay down loans, while also creating a nest egg. To be honest, we really don’t have that bad of credit card debt when compared to the national average. But it’s still more than I’m comfortable with so this year it will be paid off. I also want to pay down as much of our mortgage and car payments as possible so that we’re in a better spot come Spring/Summer when we buy a new house.

How: Budget, budget, budget! I created a spreadsheet that lays out our fixed expenses (bills) versus variable expenses (shopping, groceries, eating out, etc) and our income. Our bank has a neat feature that shows us our spending report for 2010 (how much we spent in various categories throughout the year). So, I took that and figured out what our monthly spending was in each area. Then we came up with our new budget goals. Here’s an example:

I then created an expenses worksheet that will help us track our spending. I broke out sections for each area and included our dollar allotment at the top. As we spend, we’ll write it on the worksheet and can then see how close we’re getting to our budgeted goal. We’ll have to use it for a while and make adjustments as we go but I think it will help.

Ihave posted it in the kitchen so we remember to record our expenses:

(inside our pantry door)

(Sidenote – see the wall sconce in the background? That’s the one Isabella’s woobie got lost in way back when. Yeah.)

This one will really challenge us to get creative. We’ll have to shop smart, plan meals, and say “no”. It will definitely be an adjustment but it’s necessary and after a while, we’ll get used to it and it won’t feel so restrictive.

—

There you have it! Those are my 3 resolutions for 2011. I think they are all doable and I’m really gung-ho about them right now. By posting them here, I’m hoping this will help me stay accountable. The competitive side of me will not want to admit public defeat!!

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Bucket List

135 and 135 are not the same