Isabella has always been a great little shopping buddy. She sits in the cart with no problem and is content to ride around and look at stuff. She doesn’t complain or whine or cry. Sometimes she’ll start to get antsy but it’s easily curtailed with a snack or toy.

Consequently, I love taking her shopping with me. Yesterday was a whole other matter though.

Omaha is going through a heat wave right now. It’s over 100 degrees out there, and that’s before the heat index is factored in. Needless to say we were looking for indoor activities during the weekend. At least for me and Isabella. CJ headed to the lake for sand volleyball on Sunday but it was way too hot for Munchkin and I had no desire to be out in the heat either. So she and I were planning to go grocery shopping and then kick back at home and enjoy a beautiful thing called air conditioning.

I ran out Sunday morning for a meetup with friends and on my way home (about 12:30) got a call from CJ that someone was coming to look at our house at 2pm. I ran home and we frantically cleaned and straightened while Isabella napped. All of a sudden I got some cramps and ran in to the bathroom, hit with a case of the runs. Yes, I’m talking to you about poop again!

Great timing. Here I am trying to clean and get ready to dash out when suddenly I am chained to the toilet. I took an Immodium and prayed.

Isabella woke up and we headed out. I still wasn’t feeling great but didn’t have any choice but to leave. We headed over to Target to grab lunch before shopping. As we’re sitting in the cafe eating, Isabella starts making her poop face.

And this was a SERIOUS poop face. Bright red face, flared nostrils, eyes staring in to space and her mouth in a firm grimace. Since we’re trying to make her aware of her potties I asked if she was pooping. She looked right at me, still red-faced, and said “No.”

Um, really? Honey, you’re not fooling anyone. Not even that emo kid refilling his Mountain Dew behind you.

So I went and changed her in the Target bathroom.

Then we hit the aisles and started filling up the cart. Not 5 minutes in to our shopping Isabella says, “Mommy, I pooped again.” Since her track record had already showed her to not be entirely truthful today, I nodded and smiled. Until it hit me – the smell. She wasn’t kiddin’ this time!

I figured I would shop my way up to the front and then change her again. By the time we got up front, the smell was unbearable. I’m pretty sure we were getting nasty looks from other shoppers too. So I hurried to the restroom again. This time it was Munch who had the runs. It was a mess to clean and I almost used up all the wipes. I did use my last diaper so I prayed that she would hold off on number 2 #3 until we got home.

When we got back to our cart Munchkin decided she was done with riding and needed to be carried. I really wasn’t feeling up to holding her and pushing the cart and trying to pick out good bananas all at the same time. I told her to walk or ride. She chose walk. But only for a few feet at which point she grabbed my leg and started crying, “Mommy hold you! Mommy hold you!” To avoid the impending scene, I picked her up.

I could still smell the stench. I thought it was just from the trauma of it all. Then Isabella said “I still smell poopoos mommy.” Great. If the 2 year old could smell it and articulate it, it must be real.

I looked and she hadn’t gone again. However I discovered that the bottom of her shirt was wet and “pooed” on from before. And I was holding her and therefore had poo guts on my arm. Oh ick. I put her back in the cart. I didn’t care if she was crying. I didn’t want to hold her with poop all over her back!

Of course I didn’t have a change of clothes with me (for either of us). So off to the children’s department we ran and Isabella got to pick out a new Sesame Street shirt.

By this point I was done with shopping. Screw my list. I wanted to go home. I paid for our stuff and headed out to the car. As soon as we stepped outside we were hit with the soupy humid air and Isabella said, “It’s hot mommy. Can you blow on it?”  If only I had that power then we would be rich! But alas, I don’t.

I unloaded the groceries to the car and quickly changed Isabella in to her new shirt. I also wiped the cart down as best I could. Then we headed home. I was praying the perspective buyers would be gone so that I could have my house back – and a fresh stack of diapers. Fortunately they were and the rest of the afternoon was fine. No more exploding diarrhea (for either of us).

I did however feel well enough to have a hot caramel sundae later that night. Hey, it was National Ice Cream Day. It would be unAmerican NOT to have some.

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Toot Toot

The Meltdown

Make it Stop!

Every morning, before I leave for work, I stop in Isabella’s room to give her a good-bye kiss and hug, wishing her a great day and telling her how much I’ll miss her. She always asks me to pick her up and she hugs me. She never wants me to leave. I love that tradition we have.

But none of that happened this morning.

She was up a little earlier than usual, cutting in to CJ’s shower time. So in order to still sneak in a quick washing, he set up the portable DVD player in her room with Elmo’s World on it. He didn’t start it though, just left it on the menu screen so that I could start it after saying my good-byes.

I went in and the first thing she said was “Elmo’s on mommy!” Oh goodie.

I asked her for a kiss and she said “NOOOOO!!!” and ran to the opposite side of the crib. I walked to that side and asked for a hug. “NOOOOO!!” and she ran away again.

Fine. I asked if she wanted Elmo and she exclaimed, “OK!” So I pushed play and then leaned in to give her a kiss on the cheek, at which point she batted me away.

WTF?! I’ve been replaced by a little red monster who can only refer to himself in the third person!

No worries. I’ll remember this the first time she asks to borrow the car, stay out late, go on a date, needs some money or wants to buy that really cute pair of jeans. I’ll look at her, scream “NOOOOO!!” and run to the opposite side of the room.

Because believe you me, I have the memory of an elephant (just ask CJ) and I’m not afraid to use it!

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Shell Shocked

Just What I Needed

Toot-Toot

For months now, Isabella has enjoyed this fun little game called “wake up!” It’s simple really. All you do is pretend to sleep (actually you don’t have to pretend – you can really be asleep) and she will run up and yell “WAKE UP!” in a really high pitched loud voice! She thinks it’s the funniest thing ever!

She also enjoys it in reverse. Only, when we yell “wake up” to her, we also tickle her. Double whammy!

Tonight we were playing that game on the bed and I grabbed my camera to take a pic of her after I yanked off a pillow and yelled “wake up!” When the flash went off she said “The sun’s inside mama”. I explained to her the whole concept of ‘flash’ on a camera and then she asked for more. “More flash mama!”

Here is the series of pics I took:

We both had so much fun!

By the way, just a few weeks ago she started switching between calling me “mommy” and “mama”. For some reason when she says mama it’s like so totally adorable and just melts my heart each time. She can pretty much have anything she wants when she says it.

“Oobie please mama?” Yes of course!

“Can I run with scissors mama?” Sure!

“Can I play with this knife mama?” Anything for you sweetie!

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Kissy Face

I could get used to this

Earmuffs!

Apparently Isabella is a nature lover. She wants to be outside all the time. She looks out the window and watches birds. When we play outside, she hugs the trees. Course, she also throws things at my flowers so who knows.

The other day, I was changing her diaper and she was staring at my arm. All of a sudden she said “leaves”. Um, what’s that sweetheart? I didn’t know if she wanted me to leave or had seen leaves somewhere or got in to CJ’s sage.

She said it again, “Leaves on there mommy.”

Leaves where Munchkin?

“Right there!!” and she pointed to my arm. That’s when it hit me: she thought the freckles on my arms were leaves. And then she said this:

“Mommy has leaves and grass on her arm.”

That’s right, she equates my arm hair to grass.

I guess I am Mother Earth. At least in her eyes.

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Perfect Fall Day

Ghostly Grass

A year later